Why You Need a Self-Care Plan You’ll Stick To

I see self-care everywhere on social media. But’s it’s more than not coupled to some kind of product. “Buy this face cream to start your self-care routine.” “Order these moisturizing gloves and start to feel more like yourself.”

I’m not knocking all that. Well, I kind of am. Businesses need to make money and influencers need to make money. I get it and I’m not mad at that.

My point is, sure, get all of the products if you want them.

But do they get at what you need?

Does it move you forward?

If you haven’t read over my thoughts on what is self-care, I recommend you take a look. It lays the framework for what I think self-care really is (spoiler alert: it’s more than getting a facial).

Here, we’re going deeper into why having a self-care plan is the thing that makes your efforts worth it, what happens when you start treating your well-being as a top priority.

Going back to social media for a second. When I see an influencer with flawless skin doing her thing, all of a sudden I’m thinking, "oh my goodness, I need that face mask right now!" That’s usually not self-care. That’s panic-response mode to an external stimulus.

A self-care plan keeps you from reaching that point in the first place. It’s proactive, not reactive.

When you plan out your self-care like how you plan meals or work deadlines, you become the priority, and not an afterthought. Again, scheduling lavender foot soaks every Wednesday might be your thing. And that’s great! I love me a good foot soak.

But a plan is more than an impulse to spend money willy-nilly. A plan is your go-to routine that you’ve established for you, because it’s what you need.

When you already know how you’ll take care of yourself, you avoid decision fatigue. You create structure you can fall back on when you're overwhelmed or short on time. And most importantly, you stop waiting for things to fall apart before you care for yourself.

Self-care routines give your body something reliable to count on.

Most of us don’t realize how much we need a self-care routine until our bodies and minds start waving red flags.

Here’s what I noticed for me. Perhaps you can relate. I got snippy over the littlest thing that usually wouldn’t bother me. I reached for my phone all the time, even though I knew it wasn’t helping. My sleep was a mess. I was tired throughout the day, yet wired at night.

When you don’t have a plan in place, your self-management becomes reactionary. You bounce between doing way too much (gotta stay busy, right?) and then crashing hard. “I’ll rest when I finally have time.” No! We have to carve out time because we need it to function.

Without that built-in rhythm of self-care, you may start resenting the people or things that suck the life out of you, when really, the missing piece is support for yourself.

I like to view a self-care plan as a flexible routine based on how I live, consisting of three parts.

First, you have your check-ins. A check-in is basically a question asked over and over again, daily or weekly. Ask yourself, “What do I need right now?” It could be sleep, physical activity, real food, or a good old fashion cry session. (Oh man, those can feel sooo good). Whatever it is, pointing it out is the first step to responding to it.

Second, you need your basics. These are your 2–3 non-negotiables that keep you going. For me, it’s drinking enough water, getting some sort of movement in, and having time to tidy my workspace when I’m finished for the day. Yours might be completely different from mine. I hope that it is!

Third, have your support tools. These are the backups. Like playlists that de-stress you, affirmations that lift you up, or having a friend you can call whenever you feel like things are off kilter.

What works for me won’t necessarily work for you, because we’re two different people. So now it’s time to get up close and personal.

Ask yourself these questions. When do I feel most depleted? Is it after work, during social gatherings, or first thing in the morning? When do I feel most like me? Use these answers to figure out where and when your self-care routines are most needed.

Choose habits that take minimal effort but offer a noticeable return. Drinking water before your coffee helps your brain wake up without feeling the caffeine crash. I would know, I drink a lot of coffee.

Putting your phone in another room for 20 minutes can reduce anxiety and help you focus. You’ll be ok, I promise!

Sitting outside in fresh air, even for five minutes, can be a gift. And taking a few deep breaths before starting your day gives you a chance to ease into the swing of things.

Please don’t try to create your routine around an imaginary schedule where you’re always rested and have 90 free minutes. Wouldn’t that be nice? That’s not how I roll. Instead, work with what you’ve got.

If you only have five minutes between meetings, use them to stretch. If your mornings are impossible, maybe your routine is centered around how you wind down in the evenings. The best self-care routines fit into your life.

Okay, so you’ve got your loose plan. Now what? How do you make sure you do it?

Keep it in sight. That might be a checklist on your fridge, a sticky note on your mirror, or an app on your phone. Your self-care routine should be simple enough to remember. Out of sight really does mean out of mind.

Remove all the guilt. If you miss a day, you didn’t fail! Pick it up the next day, or the next week.

Stack it to something you already do. Habit-stacking makes routines way easier. Drink water while your coffee is brewing. Call a friend while you go for a walk. Play soft music while you tidy up. I do all of these!

Linking new habits to your old ones increases the likelihood that you’ll do them.

If doing facials with pricey products is your thing, then have at it. But I don’t believe that you need a morning-routine influencer to come up with a self-care plan that you can stick to.

All you need is some structure, a sprinkle of flexibility, and all of you.